Dinner Table

Our family still sits down at the dinner table almost every single night to eat. Nothing formal, we use a lot of throw away plates, but we try to all sit as a family each night. Matt does when he’s home and not on a crazy shift. Typically we talk a lot about the kids school, who said what, who they talked to or played with, who is in what grade, etc. They attend a small school and know most if not all of the kids, so my husband and I have gotten to ‘know’ the kids as much as we can through Lane and Morgan.

The other night Morgan casually mentioned that there are several kids in her school that are neutered. Yep, everyone stopped eating and just looked at each other to make sure we all heard the same word, neutered, and that Morgan said it. Kyle didn’t care or know what it meant so he resumed with his dinner. The rest of us weren’t about to let this go! I asked Morgan to repeat what she said. 

“Yeah a couple kids in my school are neutered.”

Lane, 12 years old, looks at me and knowing what this is, mainly because we just had our dog neutered a couple months ago, starts to laugh and is ready to lose it. They both attend the same school. 

Matt mentions that it can’t be what she means to say. And I told her that no one in the school is neutered and she couldn’t possibly know any of this. 

She insisted that kids are neutered. Because she kept saying it, of course, it became funnier! Matt asked her where she even heard the word, to which she promptly responded with, “my teachers say it!” Lane is now rolling with laughter.

I asked her to name the kids she thinks are neutered. When she named the few she knew, Lane yells, “Morgan they are tutored! Not neutered, TUTORED!”

And the classic Morgan response, “yeah, well, same thing!”

Not Acceptable

 Over the holiday season our family went to Siesta Key and usually when we fly (which isn’t that often) we fly out of Pittsburgh, but this time we had planned to fly out of Harrisburg. The airport in Pittsburgh is just a little closer with driving distance but a much bigger airport and didn’t have a direct flight into Sarasota. So even though Harrisburg is a little farther we thought it would be better. Let me clarify, the adults thought it would be better, the kids hate the car, so they wanted the shortest drive possible. 

Morgan thinks a 15 minute ride in the car anywhere is too long, like going to the grocery store is a hassle for her. 

The kids knew ahead of time that we would have about a two and a half hour car ride to get to the airport but that I would take snacks and they each had activities for the car and plane. We were only about 15 minutes from the house when it started. 

Kyle started messing with Morgan, he crossed the imaginary line in the car and touched her coat several times. Morgan responded at the top of her lungs with, “Kyle, you remember when I had corona?! Well, this is the coat I wore, it’s covered in covid Kyle...covered in covid! Now it's the rona coat.”

Matt told her to calm down and she couldn’t say things like that! I’m trying my best to not laugh out loud and telling Kyle to stay on his side and not mess with her. 

I looked at Matt and said it’s too early in the car ride for this! 

We got about another mile or two and we both hear Kyle say, “I’m just tellin’ you now, if they make me sit in the middle seat on the plane, I’m whipping out my nerf guns and whackin’ and stackin’!” 

Matt turns around and yells, “these conversations are not acceptable!” 

I’m laughing and when Matt sees me, his face breaks into a smile and he shakes his head. Hindsight - maybe laughing and joking about the Tiger King wasn’t such a great idea. 

Surprisingly, we did manage to get on the plane after making sure Kyle didn’t take his nerf guns. 

Christmas Cookies

Each year I make some kind of Christmas cookies, while other years, I get a little ambitious and make more than 20 dozen to deliver and share. This year was an ambitious year so when my mother-in-law and sister-in-law said they were making sugar cookies I didn't know if my kids would be up for it. However, a chance to go to their aunts house, well they were out the door. They of course brought a plate full home, even though I know they probably had a dozen between the three of them. Or at least had a pound of icing to sample. Kyle had a lot on his shirt that he was saving for later. 

Anyway, these cookies took a little longer to consume because of all the Christmas goodies that continue to fill my pantry. (That's why I make my cookies early, so I know they are eaten.) I pack my husband's lunch each day for work and the kids have all gotten accustomed to figuring out a dessert to pack. Lane doesn't participate as much anymore but when he was little he did a lot with a special note. The other night I started to place things in his lunch and Morgan and Kyle decided they would each pack a cookie. 

The next morning, Morgan asked "Dad, did you like the cookies?" I was walking away from the kids, passing my husband, as he started to say, "oh yes, absolutely I loved them," and I whispered that Morgan packed the reindeer and Kyle the tree, so that he could comment individually, which he did. You could see both children's smiles.

Later that evening, we were all in the living room and the kid's van driver called, asking if he could stop to give all of the kids a gift, even though Kyle isn't even in school yet. (Our van driver is one of the nicest and sweetest people; he just is a genuine person.) After ending the call, I looked to my husband and said, "I don't even have anything made for him, I guess maybe I could give him a couple cookies the kids made." There were just a handful left. 

As soon as I said it he responded with...

"No you can't do that, those cookies are gross, they are old! And stale! You cannot give him those! They're over two weeks old!"

Morgan's head swiveled right to her dad and yelled, "YOU SAID THOSE COOKIES WERE GREAT!"

I had to hide my face and leave the room because I was laughing so hard. My husband rarely makes a mistake like this, like once every 10 years, but boy when he does...he makes it count. 

He tried to recover by saying, "well they were great yesterday honey, but today they went bad!" 

Seriously I had tears from laughing so hard. As Morgan looks away from him, he imitates pulling his foot out of his mouth. 

I packed the dessert today. :) 

Filthy Animal

This year our family spent Thanksgiving at home because of the coronavirus pandemic and even though I made a full dinner/lunch it didn't quite feel like a normal Thanksgiving holiday, so I think each one of us was ready to start with the magic and celebration of Christmas. I mean the kids had talked about their Advent calendars and were more excited to start those than anything turkey. After our lunch the kids talked about watching a Christmas movie, Lane had talked the Morgan and Kyle into watching Home Alone, and then the following day they could watch Home Alone 2: Lost in New York. 

The Christmas movie watching has turned into a daily, evening occurrence, and the movie has consistently been Home Alone. If Home Alone has been on television during the day, well...we obviously need to have it playing, even if we are in and out of the living room. It must play! The only slight break is if one of The Santa Claus movies are on. Now, I'm not really complaining because I do enjoy all of the above movies; I may feel differently by the time December 25th rolls around but for the time being, I'm good. 

However, when Kyle, 5 years old, is arguing with Lane, 12 years old, and suddenly screams "stop it you filthy animal!" we may need to reevaluate and limit Kyle on how much Home Alone he's viewing. Or maybe when we are all sitting down at dinner and the conversation turns into comparing dad to Marv and Harry as a legitimate conversation...well maybe we should start watching a different movie?! Anyone up for National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation? 

Where's the House?

We moved back to Somerset County, PA in the middle of last year because well, lets face it, we missed home. Plus, with three kids, this momma needed some help. 

When we sold our house in Washington, PA we hadn’t found another to purchase so my great-grandma allowed my family to move into her house until we found something permanent. My great-grandma currently lives in a nursing facility, so I guess technically my grandma and grandfather are allowing us to stay. Yes, you read that right – stay not stayed! We still haven’t moved but we will soon, at least that’s what I’ve been told. The building process or should I say the survey/deed/permit/loan process has been painstakingly slow. 

However, when I took the kids to see the equipment arriving after school and work one day, Kyle was super excited! “Is that our new house?” 

He’s three, so obviously he was referring to the port-o-potty, the only room looking structure he could see. Yes sweetheart, Mommy says we could all live in a phone booth but that doesn’t mean we are going too, that’s a bathroom. 

“We have to go outside to go to the bathroom?! Why? Can't we have one inside? But where’s the house?”

That's the question I have too kiddo, where's the house?