Monday, April 5, 2010

Melmo-Melmo

Previously I was never interested in nor did I watch Dancing with the Stars but when I heard this season would have Kate Gosselin and the Bachelor I thought I would watch the first show to see how Kate did, and maybe to see if there was chemistry between Jake and his partner Chelsea. (I wanted Jake to pick Ali not Vienna.) Anyway…I watched the first hour and couldn’t take anymore; I figured I switch the television back and forth to try to catch Kate. If it was purely dancing I wouldn’t have a problem but all the other stuff, I got bored. Ended up missing Kate dance but did see a highlight and she didn’t look to good.

The following night my husband, son and I were all at the dinner table and my husband asked me if I watched the show and who were the other participants. Without ever missing a beat my little boy looked up from his plate, said “Melmo,” looked back down and continued eating his dinner. My husband for a minute looked at our son, then at me, with the thought, “Is Elmo really on Dancing with the Stars.” The facial expressions of my son and husband were hilarious, the fact that the little boy never missed a beat, my husband at first believed him…well needless to say I laughed hysterically for about 15 minutes. It was so darn funny. Everything right now is “Melmo,” he’s on television, if he pretends to talk on the phone, he’s talking to “Melmo.” Oh my! Too cute!

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Quick Laundromat


The next Saturday when we went back, same morning routine of packing, things seemed to be going okay, the feces were still there but I checked every single washer thoroughly before I put in any clothes. I did manage to save a lady from putting her clothes in the soiled washer and she so very nicely told me that the owner was outside and I should let him know. Great, fabulous, I now have the pleasure of telling the owner about his disgusting washer. Never ever thought or wanted to be this person.

I walk out to tell him what happened, and I’m sure my face was red, wouldn’t yours be?! He casually walks in, looks, turns to me and asks, “What should I do?” Now I wanted to scream and tell him to get it out, it’s disgusting, it’s gross, and don’t you look at anything, or haven’t you smelled it in the past week! But I didn’t; I looked and said I would go home, get clothes, wrap my arm in a plastic garbage bag and pick it out. This is not what he had in mind… ”let’s just wash it.” And that is exactly what he did, ever wash crap? Well it doesn’t go away; it just goes into many, many pieces throughout the entire washer.

Laundromat Nightmares

As I said, I really don’t care for Laundromats, there has only been one in my entire life that I didn’t mind so much, and that was before I had a child. Saturday mornings were reserved for getting up, getting the baby ready, and heading four miles down the road to the disgusting place. If you are a mother or someone that has a young child you will understand how much of a production it is to go to a Laundromat to do several loads of laundry and keeping a young child entertained without touching too much of anything. I made oatmeal and thought if I can feed him breakfast while the clothes are washing, it might kill some time and he won’t be as antsy. So let’s go through the mental checklist to make sure we have everything: breakfast, milk, a spoon, napkins, bib, diaper, wipes, toys, stroller, laundry basket, laundry, detergent, dryer sheets, quarters, keys, hopefully that’s it. We arrive and I have my son in the stroller, wheeled him halfway, get the clothes out of the car, with my son always in my sight, take the clothes in, wheel the stroller in, and okay, actually everything is now inside. And I’m thinking I’ll get the clothes in to the washers and started, then breakfast, well what I wasn’t quite ready for was when I started putting my husbands work clothes in something smelled absolutely horrible. I mean I know that sometimes they smell but never this bad; I questioned whether he had an accident. (He loved that this crossed my mind, please note sarcasm.) I put in the second armful of his work clothes and thought they can’t all smell this bad…so I looked into the washer and there it was. Disgusting, foul, gross human feces. Oh I have never been so grossed out, now remember I already have some clothes in this washer, have to pull them back out and thank God that none of the clothes came in direct contact with the feces. Picture the sight, because at this point I’m gagging and jumping around because I was disgusted beyond belief. My son is watching with wide eyes because his Mommy is jumping around. So much for the nice smell of oatmeal.
I did wash that round of clothes twice. My son did finally get his breakfast and got too tired of being there about halfway through the second round of washing my husbands work clothes, and the people that arrived were not pleased with my son’s unhappy fussing.
Oh well, this was our Saturday’s!

Along with a new job…

My husband was given the opportunity to have a new, more stable job and after weighing all the pros, growth, stability, and the cons, moving, not being near my family, we decided he should take the position. He was driving over two hours to get to work and then over two to get home, six times a week, which would drive anyone crazy. So we decided that we would rent a small place, that way he could come home each weekend and the baby and I would stay a couple nights through the week.

We assumed we would slowly transition, sell our home, and I would search for a new job. That slow transition turned into a downright sprint. I received a wonderful position and it was decided that husband, baby, and I would move into the rental and try to sell our house as fast as possible.

What you don’t yet understand is the rental…a small, two-bedroom, dirty trailer with a neighbor that wasn’t even cordial. I am not bashing trailers or trailer parks by any means; I lived in a trailer court until 3 years of age and a trailer until 10 years of age, but this particular trailer was gross. Although, I cleaned and it was temporary, so I kind of got passed that. Kind of! The three bottles of Lysol, 409, Pine Sol, and air fresheners helped. The outlets didn’t always work, the stove would quit halfway through a meal, and the faulty wires all added to my particular love of the new place. The part that I could not, maybe would not, get passed is the laundry, at the Laundromat. I’ve never liked going to the Laundromat, it’s always been a pet peeve of mine, especially because I wash a ton of clothes. Too bad, so sad, I had to, every Saturday and sometimes once through the week.

This all just scratches the surface of my real life nightmare. But thankfully, the nightmare is over!